Originally Posted by Darian Rachal
Jim, I do not find the thought of two attractive women engaging in gay sex repulsive. I do find the thought of "masculine" women engaging in gay sex repulsive. The thought of a threesome with two attractive women is a pleasant fantasy.
Richard mentioned the thought of kissing a man repulsive and I certainly agree with him. I am assuming that you would find it just as repulsive?
"...gay attraction is just as real and just as normal as your own attraction patterns."
Jim, in this "broken world", people are born with all types of what I consider disorders. Some are born mentally retarded, others are born with handicaps, autistic, etc. If a person is born with an attraction to the same sex, that is what I consider a disorder. I definitely am not inclined to characterize it as normal.
I'm in no position to cast judgment on an individual engaging in homosexual behavior.
Therefore, "I will do my best to be understand and accept this man."
You might recall what I said about the homosexual men I worked with, in response to James' post. One in particular, I still have a great deal of admiration for.
I've been fortunate within the last 5 or 6 years to travel to parts of the world where the culture is quite dissimilar to the US, and to be able to associate with individuals from various cultures. It's truly the highlight of my life, and although I definitely stand out, I've never felt uncomfortable.
Hi Darian:
Thanks for the thoughtful post. The less important part of our discussion comes down to what we define as normal vs. a disorder. I'm personally not comfortable defining Downs syndrome, autism, homosexuality or other variations from the majority as being a "disorder" because disorder implies to me that this is something that might be fixed, corrected or even eradicated. Obviously, Downs syndrome is a serious handicap, and it can not be cured, fixed or rectified. Still, folks with Downs are fully human and can have good and even productive lives. I'm sure you are aware that Downs has almost been eradicated in certain Scandinavian Countries by targeted abortions - and I think that is horrible.
Homosexuality is not a mental handicap, but, like Downs syndrome, it does appear to be something that can not be cured, rectified or fixed. Attempts to "cure" gays in the past have typically failed with tragic results. To my knowledge there is no "gay" genetic marker, like there is with Downs, but both are characteristics of the way some people's brains simply are. Whether the way their brain functions is the result of genetics, or in-utero development or early childhood development or a combination of factors is an interesting topic, but not important to the fact that gays are gay and generally always will be.
So, I would argue that homosexuality is normal the way red hair is normal. Both homosexuality and red hair are not extremely common, but both are hardly rare. Both have been with us since before history. Both are minority, but fairly common "normal" possibilities in a population of human brains and hair colors respectively. This is why I used the word "normal."
Here is the important part of our conversation: I appreciate and respect that you do your best to understand and accept gays, so do I. And in my view, acceptance is the key and important thing, not the discussion above. I'll admit to being prejudiced against gays in my youth, as were most other boys in the late 1960s and early 1970s. I am glad to have grown out of it. I am glad that gays can by and large live openly without retribution, and I am glad that my sons would think this whole conversation dated and weird. That is progress I can embrace!
Jim
